Mortal Goddess
by Angel.chexmex
Summary: The laws of gravity say that everything that goes up must come down. But she will enjoy being in the air with Tony Stark until the second she crashes to the ground. She chose her path at age four.


**This is not edited in an way so sorry for mechanical errors. Also doesn't have any Avengers but Tony and Loki. Sorry :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own avenger or iron man or any of it :(**

**Mortal Goddess**

She sits on the swing, not moving just letting the wind chill her skin and ruffle the overly large clothing she wore. Its the middle of the night and by now most kids are sleeping safe and warm in their beds, but by now, at a little over four going on forty, she is used to the cold darkness that has become her home. There are lights here and there that shine yellow and menacing on the park she sits in but she doesn't see them, has never seen anything.

But for all she cannot see she has always Seen, the past and present and future mixing and swirling until she cannot tell what was or is or will be only that on some plane it is/was/will be all at once. She Sees people she has never met and never will, has Seen people she once knew but no longer remembers because she never saw a face and never had a name to the random strangers who sometimes give her food or money, and sometimes, only sometimes, she will See the two people she has always known and always will and never wanted to.

She remembers Seeing her mother for the first time just moments after her birth and she Saw the woman who gave her life slashing her own wrists and drowning herself in a bathtub in a bathroom with sunny yellow walls and a vase of flowers shattered on the tiled floor. When the vision or prophecy ended she was left only with the need to be the best child for her mother and stop what she Saw. In the end it was her own actions that brought about the vision. Because what mother could live with a two year old child smarter than them? Able to read and write and speak and understand more than seven languages and build her own robots and create new bacteria.

After that her father dropped her off in New York one day and left, she never turned back because what would be the point, all she would see was the empty darkness that was all she had ever seen. From then on she was careful with what she Saw. Looking for what she could change and what was better left alone because she Saw possibilities that could be changed and actions that had passed and things that were and would soon be past. She had to live Seeing things she could never change and some, some she wouldn't want to.

_Laughter floated through the air and painted the cold, empty mansion with a joyful light as a young boy, seven or eight but so much wiser and older and smarter than men four times his age, carried a little girl, only a year younger but even older than the boy and even more broken, down the large staircase in the center of the house. She couldn't stop grinning even if she had wanted to and his laughter coated her like a warm blanket, safe and comforting and beautiful and perfect and everything. Because they were one person in two bodies and ever since she had moved in with him she had been so so so happy. _

_"Anthony Edward Stark!" Tony laughed his brown eyes sparkling happily as he continued to run with his sister/friend/other half on his back shouting encouragement as he ducked down hallways and away from the babysitter chasing them. She still wasn't familiar enough with all of the halls and stairs of the mansion to escape quickly enough on her own and she couldn't rely on Seeing everything, so he carried her around when they got in trouble and even if he couldn't make it nearly as far with her he never considered her a burden because she made him smile and do the first time in his life he didn't have to be the perfect Anthony Stark, he could just be Tony._

She began to pump her legs and swing as she Saw what might/would/could be and almost, almost, smile at the thought of someone who could love her, accept her as she was. But she was too jaded to simply accept it and believe in it because she knew that her greatest foe had always been hope.

_The two of them sat in front of a laptop as lines of code crawled up its screen and he looks and looks and stop. Another piece wrong, a puzzle without all the pieces and this one was to the wrong puzzle and he reads the numbers and words and symbols out loud and she hums and thinks and together they will write a new code, something better, making the puzzle piece that didn't exist to finish the puzzle they had created. _

_"Goddammit!" And Tony, her beautiful, perfect, silly Tony would get so frustrated at every failure, every set back, and she would just smile and give him a hug and bring him back to the drawing board so they could start again. _

_"He needs a name." She says this time, out of character and for that Tony wonders and worries._

_"He?" Tony asks sticking to what he knows and pushing back any other feelings because his sister/friend/everything always does what is best and never says anything without a reason._

_"Its a he." She replies happily._

_"A he?" Tony questions again but this time its amused and he is thinking of a name as he asks the question. "JARVIS," he suggests because his mind is incredible and has already worked through a million and more names and this is the one he likes._

_"JARVIS?" She questions tilting her head and letting long blond hair spill over the laptop that laid forgotten between the two friends/siblings/everything._

_"Just A Really Very Intelligent System," Tony replies with a grin and they are both laughing because its so Tony and so them and just perfect and, in five years when they finally complete JARVIS, he finds it funny too._

She doesn't notice him at first, the brown haired boy that walks into her park in the middle of the night. He is five and short and wearing designer clothing, and he looks so sad if she could only see him. But for now she is stuck in the then/now/before that is here/there/everywhere/nowhere and so he simply climbs onto the swing next to hers and subconsciously they both match up and are then swinging together.

_Tony is laughing again and the sound is beautiful and perfect and wonderful more so because she is the cause and, even though is laughing about the food she attempted to prepare and standing over the burnt blackened thing on the stove, she can't ever get enough of it and maybe, just maybe, if she touches his lips with hers she'll be able to taste the joy. It isn't until a warm tongue slips past her lips and touches her own that she realizes her that's had become actions and she was on top of Tony kissing him and when a hand slides inside her shirt she doesn't object just presses closer to the warm hand cupping her breast and moans._

_It is the first time she is touched in such a way by anyone but for him it is the millionth. But she is different because Tony loves her and will always love her and the a transition from friend to sister to lover to everything is so perfectly smooth it is as if it were written in the stars and destined to be. _

_It maybe the first time they touch but it is not the last and the day she turns eighteen is the day Tony takes her to a church and marries her. She's a Stark now and will always belong to Tony and that's all that matters because Tony will never let her go and she never wants him to._

"Why are you out so late?" His voice is what draw her from the vision of ifs/whens and she tunes to face him, sightless blue eyes slightly unnerving beneath the yellow buzzing light of the street lamps.

"This is my park." She replies with a shrug because is true. She has nothing else to call her own and no one makes her leave here and so it is hers now. Beneath the playground her name is even carved into the ground so everyone knows.

"What about your parents?"

"Dead," and its true because just yesterday, or was it next week or maybe even last month, she Saw her Father's drunken death behind the wheel of a car.

"That's nice," she blinks and pauses then laughs because yeah, it kind of is nice.

"And you?"

He hums legs still pumping as they swing in tandem always side by side. "Mom's dead Dad doesn't care, I'm avoiding the babysitter...its my birthday." He adds the last almost hopefully and she smiles because she remembers what it felt like to hope.

"Happy birthday," because why not?

_"Tony~" she sings skipping into the penthouse before remembering, again again again, that Tony's gone gone gone. That he left and is Afghanistan and will come back as a metal man and so different but still her Tony. And she knows she can't do anything for him even though she knows the longitude and latitude of his exact location and how long to get and feet and miles and kilometers and everything and anything. But she has to wait because he must come back as a metal man or not at all, that doesn't stop the pain._

_And when he does come home he takes her in his arms and its two puzzle pieces coming together again to form perfect picture. The edges might be a bit beaten but they still click perfectly and that's all that matters. So later when Pepper finds the both of them pouring over suits made of metal and diagrams and arc reactors she just sighs and leaves again. Because they are one and Tony's obsessions are hers and they will make the Iron Man together or not at all._

"I'm five today." Five and already so broken.

"I'm four," or was four or will be four. It depends on the time but she thinks she's four, or at least will be for now.

"That's nice," and no not this time because at four she can't get a job or money or a place to stay, but she just smiles because he doesn't need to know that, not yet.

"What presents did you get?" Children get presents on their birthdays don't they? She thought she had heard that somewhere.

Ah yes, and now the book is more enthusiastic telling her in great detail all about his gifts. Briefly she wonders what it feels like to be so happy.

_Obediah's betrayal hit them hard because he was father/brother/friend/protector and now he's enemy/betrayer/destroyer/dead. At their wedding Obadiah had walked her down the aisle and just days ago he had tried to kill Tony._

_Afterwards they hide behind walls of metal and mind only trusting each other and Pepper because she's always been there and always will be and they love her as the older sister they have never had. _

_Pepper is the one that draws them out from their world and keeps them alive with food and necessities while JARVIS with his proper British voice warns them of sleep deprivation and alcohol consumption. They don't listen but the reminder warms them anyways because even if he is only an A.I. they have two beings that care._

The boy stops his swing and so does she because he stopped talking to and she doesn't know why doesn't even know if she is here or there or now or then or will be. But she stops and he looks at her, into her sightless eyes as if she could stare back.

He holds out his hand out decisively. "My name is Tony Stark..."

_It's the day before their anniversary and she's bought all she needs to make Tony's favorite dishes because this is their ninth anniversary but she still likes making them each special and wonderful and perfect even with the news she brings and the horrible knowledge lurking in her mind just waiting to be shared with Tony and hurt him too._

_Then there's a noise from the bedroom and she's curious because there shouldn't be anyone home so she goes to see the who it is and JARVIS, sweet beautiful perfect baby JARVIS, tries to warn her. "Ma'am I don't think you want to..."_

_But she cuts him off because curiosity killed the cat and she has always been her Tony's vixen. She steps into the room and suddenly she Sees. She Sees as if it was just normal sight and what she Sees breaks her as nothing else could. Pepper, her sister/friend/mother, is on top of Tony, her friend/husband/lover, and there is no mistaking what they are doing. Clothes are strewn around the room and pants and moans of pleasure mingle in the air as the smell of Tony/Pepper/sex/sweat replaces the scent of Tony/her/love. _

_As they scream out their completion she stumbles back and leaves, out the bedroom door and as far away as possible. Tony hears her leave and follows, soothing Pepper by telling her he is only going for a drink because she did not hear. _

_They meet in the kitchen, where their love truly began and it seems where their love will end. "Why?" Its a quiet, broken whisper but it seems to set Tony off and he speaks as if he has been holding these words back for a while._

_"Because you always disappear and don't answer my calls and won't tell me where you go at random times of the day! You've been pulling away for weeks and haven't smiled in even longer! When were together it seems forced and Pepper has been with me through everything! She would never leave me as a prisoner if she knew where I was no matter what or who might tell her to!" She crumbles at that, wilts and pulls away because she thought he understood. She was always here/there/everywhere/nowhere and at the time she didn't/couldn't do anything because he had been when they had found him and was when he was with her and the times and places blurred and mixed until she just didn't know._

_But it seems she was wrong, so very wrong. "You can't say you didn't see this coming." Its an accusation and she knows Tony says it so she will agree and lit some of the weight from his shoulders, but she didn't know didn't see or See. _

_Instead she pulls the slim titanium ring encrusted with opals from her ring finger and slides it across the counter in his direction. "I'm sure it'll look better on Pepper."_

_And she leaves with an empty heart and broken mind keeping to herself the news that she had been visiting doctors all month and that they all say the same thing, she has seven months to live. "Do whatever you want with my things." She calls as she gets in the elevator and leaves for the last time._

_Before she exits the building she calls out to JARVIS one last time. "Take care of him." And then leaves with no money to her name or clothes or housing and seven months to live, maybe less now because she has no way to get medicine of any kind. But none of that matters, all that matters is the lightness of her left hand and the divorce papers that will reach her in a week, or already have or maybe are now, and that she has/is/will sign the papers and will no longer be any part of her ex-husband's life._

_Everything she has lived for is gone._

"...would you like to come live with me?" He asks.

Her mind whirls and spins and the current that carries her visions is sweeping away any thoughts she could have had but at those words she almost panics because her Sight is pushing at her mind and begging/screaming/telling her and something is pulling pulling pulling.

_She doesn't know how Fury learned about her because she never left Tony's house unless it was to move from one to another and the media never caught wind of her existence and that was how she liked it. But she had one or two months left and by now it didn't really matter who knew about her or her powers, she would be gone soon enough._

_But first there was something she wanted to do, most likely the last thing she would ever do. "Hello Loki," and the god whips his head up to look at her because she wasn't there a moment before._

_"A goddess in mortal flesh." He replied almost awed at her presence, but she knew, has always known, that the power she holds is for the gods and it is this power that kills her, yet if it were to be taken away she would die instantly._

_"I come to offer you a gift. Your family has betrayed you in every way and your children have been stolen from your arms. I offer you a way to get them back because your power alone is incredible and nearly unstoppable but with my power added to it you will be unstoppable. You could gather your children to you and live in Jötunheimr." Because she had read all about the troubles Loki suffered and under his circumstances she would have destroyed the world far sooner than he._

_"Jötunheimr!" Loki spits out the word savagely. _

_"History is written by the victor." She cautions good naturedly. "And Asgard has won all of those wars."_

_Loki pauses at this and studies her, looking for deceit or extra strings. "You are willing to give me everything I could ever want. What is the cost?"_

_And she smiles because her only price is so small as to be negligible. "I want only for you to refrain from hurting Tony Stark. I have two months left at most, it makes no difference."_

_"If I do this you will never go to Hel and never see your Man of Iron again. Your soul will not be recycled into a new body but destroyed forever." Loki warns even as he presses his hand through the glass barrier keeping them apart._

_"I know," is her only response and she links her hand with his. He pulls the power from her body without anymore questions and slowly her memories begin to fade away. First the horrible four years she lived with her family then on the streets and then her happy memories. Laughter and love and joy with Tony, until all she was left with was the aching pain of betrayal, and eventually even that faded away. _

_As she drops to the ground the last thing she hears is Loki's reverently whispered words. "Thank you."_

Then she's in the park again and looking at Tony's offered hand and thinking over it all. Is the pain really worth the joy? She extends her hand and grasps Tony's hand in her own. "I'm Lisa Jones..." She replies because everything that goes up must come down but while she is in the air she will revel in it. "...and I would love to live with you."


End file.
